archives, you & me

You Don’t Need To Set Yourself On Fire To Keep Others Warm.

Your hair is singed from all the times you clipped your own wings just to make someone else happy.

Your fingertips, blistered from all the times you forgot about your own needs and gave away what was meant to be yours. Even your voice has been touched by the flame, no longer strong, but shaking and raspy from all the times you wanted to say No, but said Yes.

You have set yourself on fire to keep others warm, but inside, your soul is shivering. Your soul shivers with all the coldness of being forgotten, untouched, and unloved by you.

It’s such an easy thing to get caught up in. You give too much to others, and you are the one left standing out in the cold. You get your value from how much you give to others, rather than by how much you give to yourself. You give too much at the expense of yourself.

You do this because you are afraid to look inward, to make the jump, to do what you should to create your own life.

Oh, you have promised yourself you will do it eventually. When the kids are older, when you have more time, when you are retired. When others don’t need you. You have promised and promised, and now you are holding the final match.

Dear one, your soul can’t take it any longer. It’s begging you and pleading with you. Your body has been dissolved by the fire.

Must you burn your soul, too?

They taught you that your feelings and your needs were unimportant, and so you abandoned yourself. It’s no wonder you don’t feel like it’s safe to be with yourself. You are afraid to acknowledge what you want out of life, what your needs are.

It’s time to change that. Take that last match, strike it, and shine the light on the dusty cobwebs of your heart. It’s time to find a need of your own each day and to honor it. Each day, do something just for you. Don’t let anything or anyone stand in the way. Start listening to what your soul is craving. And do that. Get to know yourself.

Listen to your complaints, your fears, and your sadness, and honor that, too. Become your own friend.

Take that lost self gently by the hand and take it out to play. Let your self trust you again so your true self will emerge from the shadows, and then…?

… Watch as you set the whole world on fire. The fireworks will be worth it all, I promise.


Valen DawsonValen Dawson loves to laugh until her stomach hurts, dance until the world spins right again, and has a gift for capturing the world through her photographs and words. In 2013, she wrote the book, DreamCatcher: The Magic Of Living Your Dream Life, to inspire others to get in touch with themselves and to live the life they were being called to live. She is also the inspirationalist that owns this website.


Rebelle Society
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Rebelle Society
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