A Manifest(N)o: Clearing The Space For Yes To Manifest.
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I believe in focusing on that which we wish to amplify. Gratitude grows the garden of our wishes.
I subscribe to the power of positivity. I feel better when I am able to reframe my perspective and see with fresh eyes something that lifts my heart, rather than looking through downcast eyes turned towards the negative, weighed down by my heavy heart.
There are some scenarios where this shift to the positive is medicinal (while navigating a minor disappointment, for example), some where it would feel delusional (when grieving is necessary, there is no detour around it; the heavy heart needs our feeling and healing, and pretending that only positive feelings are helpful or allowed is not grounded in my truth).
I’ve read and watched The Secret, comprehend The Law of Attraction, and embrace it when wielded with a compassionate eye, a gentle hand, and wiggle room for caveats.
Suggesting reaching for a more positive thought, for example, to someone with an activated sympathetic nervous system in the midst of re-experiencing the terror of a past trauma is a moot point at best; condescending, blaming and potentially damaging at worst.
I’ve seen the many memes and read the quotes turning towards the sun:
“Promote what you love rather than bashing what you hate.” ~ Unknown
“Talking about our problems is our greatest addiction. Break the habit. Talk about your joys.” ~ Rita Schiano
“Complaining has replaced baseball as America’s national pastime.” ~ Thomas D. Barkman
“Some people grumble that roses have thorns; I am grateful that thorns have roses.” ~ Alphonse Karr
All of the above quotes speak to me. I agree.
And I believe in the power of saying No. Or roaring my No when there’s trouble in the jungle.
I believe in knowing, navigating and naming what we wish to steer clear of as we move ahead.
I believe in boundaries. I believe in saying: This is what I believe in, and to get there, these specific energies do not support me. There is great power in naming and claiming freedom from what I’m clearing with my warrior machete.
Some of these specific energies (negativity, criticizing, complaining, etc.), I am personally prone to, and now I choose to shift. One complaint at a time. I move forward doing my best.
Other energies that I’ve identified leave me feeling slimed on when I’m in their presence. I choose to not be in their presence as often as is possible.
By being more conscious of the energy I am immersed in, I become more conscious of the energy within me, and am more honed to clean up and clear out my own patterns that are not serving me or others.
I believe in accountability, and in asking to get by with a little help from my friends. I believe in accountability buddies, and aligning with like-mindeds and like-hearteds on the journey of wishing to grow and bloom in similar gardens.
By stating my Nos, I feng shui the space to make more room for my Yes to manifest.
My Manifest(N)o:
Negative Nellie-ness: No more, please! Note to self: keep upping the ante and the vibe. I’ve spent enough time with my own Debbie Downer. I don’t wish to sit and sip tea with her or her cousins any longer.
This shift is as simple and as difficult as listening to the words that come out of our mouths and through our keyboards. This is why we have filters.
Criticizing and complaining: Can. Not. Sit. Still. With. It. Anymore. Whether it’s coming out of my own mouth or another’s. My energy body feels slimy when I’m around it, sickeningly slimy when I’m the source of it.
This is a work in progress for me, as I engage in criticizing and complaining more often than I would like to, though far less often than I used to. Again, this shift is as simple as listening to our words, thinking and filtering before spewing.
Comparing: The shock factor of the energy of comparing cured me of it almost immediately. Through awareness of listening to conversations around me, I discovered that it is an epidemic of astonishing proportions.
Why, why, why do we feel a need to compare even when complimenting someone? To communicate to someone that we love their (fill in the blank), there is no need to resort to putting down another’s (fill in the blank). Yet, this dynamic runs rampant.
I was so astonished by its prevalence that I whisked this energy away lickety-split through heightened attention and hyper-focus on my words. Like a woman wielding a weed-whacker, I cut out unnecessary, unhelpful, unkind comparisons.
Gossip: Going the other way. At sprint pace. I believe we have created a culture of gossip — it is so omnipresent that many do not even recognize it, and are not aware of how deeply damaging it can be/is.
Gossip is contagious; its symptoms are a slippery slope. I find myself on more solid footing and less prone to slipping down that slope myself when I just walk away and stay away from places and spaces where this fungus festers.
May I continue to walk away with every opportunity I see. Sometimes I get snagged, or even do the snagging myself. May there be more opportunities to walk away as more of us hone our sensitivities towards the power of the word.
Badmouthing: I call bullsh*t. May I have the courage to voice that calling out of bullsh*t in the moment.
Mean Girl-ness/Mean Boy-ness/Bullying: Methinks not. Gotta call it out and get out. Jungle roar!
Prickliness, Passive Aggressiveness: Please, no. I don’t wish to tread in these murky waters. When a dynamic/relationship feels prickly, I look for the Exit sign.
Narcissism: Not interested in entanglement in that nasty net. I’ve been entangled before. To escape, I had to cut a few lines, sever a few ties, and Houdini my way outta there.
Damned-If-I-Do, Damned-If-I-Don’t critics: Given those odds, I’m gonna walk away and do as I damn well please.
Drama Mamas/Drama Papas: I prefer my drama onstage or on the screen. Otherwise, I’m out of the door. And if/when I am the one carrying the drama/stirring the pot myself, I call on my lucky stars to let me see that truth soon so I can stop.
When the drama becomes too draining, the way out becomes clearer, the pathway out better lit. There is something about drama that wants to hold us hostage. I’m learning it can be a lot easier to leave it behind than I would have ever thought.
By leaving it behind, I have much more time and energy to go enjoy it onstage.
Personalitics (i.e. drama mamas ‘n papas, bullying, feather-ruffling pot stirring for the mere sake of it, competition, domination, aggression, asshattery, mean girl/guy stuff): I have resigned from Personalitics.
My bullsh*t-ometer is becoming more and more finely-tuned. Giving myself permission to not put up with the bullsh*t is becoming increasingly automatic and unapologetic.
Letting the turkeys get me down: Time to stuff the turkeys and serve ’em up with whipped mashed potatoes.
Choking on my words: I will no longer choke on my unexpressed true feelings. I will express them. This lends itself well to helping assure that I don’t end up acting the turkey myself.
I commit to doing my best at voicing what needs to be said when I get that internal fluttering that something is askew.
Holding back: I choose to no longer make myself small for fear of how another may react. Dancing in the other direction often does the trick. Dancing away also means that I may not even know how another reacts or doesn’t react. There’s freedom in that.
Shoulds: I release shoulding myself and others. I don’t want the weight of should on my should-ers. I’d rather shimmy, shake, and dance off the shackles of shoulds. Awareness of words to the rescue.
Insensitivity: There is simply no room for insensitivity or lack of compassion in our world. May my heart and mouth always remember that. And may my feet always walk towards sensitivity and compassion when I sense the opposite.
Ahh… room to breathe… to let my guard down… to play… to be open… to be real… to be unafraid. Just to be.
Yes to manifest:
- Sweet Synergy
- Sister Support
- Reciprocity
- Collaboration
- Community
- Creating personal peace by walking towards faces and spaces of support and love
- Compassion
- Conscious communication
- Authenticity
- Truth
- Trust
- Trusting Mama Earth beneath my feet
- Trusting my wings
- Leading with heart
- Kindness
- My right to say No from the energy of
- Gentleness — being gentle on myself for every No I couldn’t speak before finding my voice
- My voice
- Celebrating and cradling my strengths and vulnerabilities
- Healing
- Peaceful power
- Powerful peace
- Sunshine
- Shining
- Sparkling
- Love, Love, Love
I grab my broom and whisk inner spaces so as to create room for the new as I manifest the Yes. I invite myself to up the ante with what I bring to the table. Can I shift away from the behaviors I want less of in my world? Yes! Here I go. Care to join me?
What is on your Manifest(N)o?
What energies are craving your wholehearted jungle roar of a Yes?
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Tracy Stamper is a dancer at heart, in mind, of body, and with words. She is blessed and blissed to call dancing her profession, thanks to the transformational conscious movement form of Nia. She teaches Nia classes and offers Nia White Belt Trainings for fellow dancers at heart, in mind, and of body. Tracy lives in St. Louis in a home on a little hill, with a whimsical wind sculpture out front, and two crazy rescue beagle boy dogs and the two human loves of her life inside. Her current favorite colors are purple, orange and glitter. She likes her chocolate dark, her little bubble of a world Personalitics-free, her inspiration flowing, and her car dances to be uninhibited. You can connect with her on her website, Nia website, and Facebook.
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