It’s the End of the World as We Know It, and I Don’t Feel Fine.
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I am a woman.
I am Latina.
I believe in God. But I give the Creator many names.
I also believe in a woman’s right to choose. In the inherent humanity of our fellow man.
In other words, I am my brother’s keeper.
And my sister’s too. Shit, I’m my sister’s buttress because she lets me offer her help.
This election was a turning point for our country, and rather than take the road not taken, rather than moving forward and onward, the citizens of this nation packed our figurative rafters with C4 and lit a match just to see how big a boom we could make. Then they stared at the night sky lit up with fire and detritus.
Because we are a nation founded by Puritans, I understood that our misogyny and gynophobia ran to our very core, but quixotically I believed that in the year 2016 a woman could stand a chance at winning the highest office of our land, some would argue, the highest in the world (despite our economic decline, the United States is still a military power, and just as important, we stand for democracy more than any other country in the world. Well, at least on paper).
When considering the woman running was one of the most qualified presidential candidates in our country’s history, and that her opponent is a racist, xenophobe, woman-hater, with the temperament of a starved lab monkey, it should have been a given that Hillary Clinton would not only be elected, but would crush Trump.
Here’s the problem, folks…
She doesn’t have a penis.
Oh, I can feel your eyes rolling. Your brain is screaming about her f*cking emails, and how oily and polished she comes across. Like a typical politician. To you, I say: I don’t give a !@#$ about her emails. I like oily and polished. In this case, it meant the candidate had equilibrium because she knew what she talking about.
Say what you want to say about Hillary Clinton’s off-putting demeanor, her lack of charisma, and her distrustful air. There’s no debating that she’s brilliant. Something Donald Trump isn’t.
And see, Trump hates everything I am. Despises what I believe in. He has offended me as a woman. A Latina. And as a person who believes in a God by many names. Any time he offends people who lead with their faith, he is offending me.
Before now, when I did not see eye to eye with a candidate and he was elected, I did not feel despair, thrown away, or less of an American because none of those men attacked me personally. None of them told me that the way I showed up in the world was intrinsically less-than. They had not assaulted me with their words and their hatred.
Inside my body, in my heart, what I carry is rejection by my country. The country that I love. If this nation could elect Donald Trump to be our leader, I am a disposable American. Everything I am is being tossed in the bin.
As Van Jones stated on CNN, “This was a White-lash.” The Men and the Whites rallied to elect Trump because they detest the changes that have occurred in America — what I consider progress.
Plainly speaking, I’m terrified for my country. What does this election say about our path? Our legacy? What will the world think, and how will it affect international affairs and the economy throughout the next four years?
There is a small part of me still clinging to hope that one day a woman will lead the United States. Another part of me wonders, if it does happen while I breathe, whether it will be a nation I recognize. Or if it will recognize me.
The faith I have always held sacred, that has carried me through painful moments, wavers. On this day, I pray God sees us through the next four years. I’m too anxious to focus on my chores and my work.
I just don’t know if it will ever happen for us.
I haven’t got high hopes to see it in my lifetime.
But then again, a racist, xenophobic misogynist with the temper of a hangry lab monkey got elected as the President of the United States.
I suppose anything is possible.
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A.P. Luna is an empath who has been practicing the Old Religion and reading tarot for over 20 years. As a High Priestess, she leads a coven and teaches the ‘occult’ arts. Reiki transformed her life in her mid-twenties, leading to her Reiki Mastership; since then, she has been studying aspects of the Universe, and life through an energetic prism. A spiritual adviser/life-coach, she works with women’s circles and individual clients for their betterment and the elevation of our collective consciousness. Her belief is that we are on the precipice of a spiritual evolutionary jump, and that women will be at the forefront of this energetic saltation, armed with intuition and love. You can contact her via email.
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