Like Clockwork: Money and the Fear Factor.


Even though my plate is overflowing with to-do’s, I feel compelled to share a word or two on the topic of money. Or as I like to call it, the haves and have-nots mentality.

From a young age, I developed issues with the fear of not having. It took me many years into my adulthood to recognize this being a spiritual and psychological block for me. All this opportunity presented itself to me, I worked my ass off, and never had anything to show for it except more debt. That is a sure sign that you have what they call a money block.

I have since begun the study into how and why this happens, researching teachings from Abraham Hicks and many entrepreneurial and manifesting books that have been handed down to me to read.

The truth is, yes we can gain valuable insight into what to do and what not to do with business lessons learnt along the way by reading other people’s experiences, but ultimately, like any change in your life, it boils down to your own choices. As obvious as that seems, it still frightfully alludes us. Choices in how you spend your money is not what I mean though. Rather more how you feel about spending your money.

Do you feel guilt, fear that you don’t know if you will have enough, or are you at peace with parting with your bucks?

My journey is what I draw from mostly. I have come far in a short space of time, and it has taken discipline and blind faith. Sometimes both at the same time, to have discipline in your blind faith, because it seems completely illogical in societal terms to be okay not having enough money for food or rent.

Don’t get me wrong, I feel stressed when I can see the depleting funds knowing that month end more than a Salticrax away. But you get good and bad stress.

Good stress is catalyzing. It gives you a kick up the butt to get on with your job and make things happen. Bad stress is debilitating. It keeps your head roaming in a never-ending loop, drawing you deeper into darkness and further away from the light of great escape.

I have learned to trust the flow, or rather the ebb and flow. The ocean is a great teacher. It teaches us to respect its power, and also to understand the currents — as the waves roll in, they also roll out. This is much like my feelings about money and just having freedom in general in life. We need to respect the power that money brings us.

After watching Stanley Kubrick’s A Clockwork Orange the other night, I realized the moral in the story. Money sets people apart in this capitalist society. It defines who gets away with what. Money buys you the power to do (mostly) what you should not do, and so long as an upstanding individual with moral grounding does not catch you in the act, you can pretty much buy your way out of things.

Bribery and corruption is a worldwide affliction, making the world continue to rotate in ways that favor the highest bidder. So, with wealth comes power, and with that power, you need responsibility and accountability for how you choose to exert that power.

If we understand the currents in terms of money or having, then we understand things like interest rates, credit scoring, and in general what our rights are. All too often in South Africa, the poorest are paying the most in order to have something. We have large retailers and loan brokers funding people’s buying power at ludicrous rates of repayment, resulting in a repayment that is double what you borrowed.

I was offered a loan by a bank the other day which would have been one and a half times what I borrowed by the time I repaid it. I understand, if you are desperate for money, then any terms will be acceptable, but that is again capitalizing on people’s misfortune. So knowing the currents gives you better ability to maneuver around them in the least destructive way to you.

Lastly, and most fundamentally for me to learn, is to allow the ebb and flow to take hold of you. Because if you fight it, you will just tire yourself out, never really getting any closer to shore and weaker for it. I have found the looser my grip is on money, the more detachment allows for more money to come and go.

So previously if I had R100, I would not want to spend it for fear that I would not have it again any time soon, or that I would waste it. Now if I spend it, it goes out and comes right back in. I only really believed in spending money on others, almost as though I was not worthy of it. So valuing yourself is also paramount into getting rid of these blocks.

I also believe in the karma of it all. You cannot go from having very little to then earning comfortably without paying it forward.

As much as I don’t like giving money to panhandlers, the reality of our economy now is that there are far too little jobs and way too many people. Our buying power sucks as well. The world is in crisis. Even with the con artists taking 20 bucks from you to pay for their starving children or taxi back home after their car broke down, chances are they are not better off than you anyway.

I think it must take a lot to stand before people in their nice cars and humbly ask for money. Even if they are getting R5000 a month doing that, what are they really able to do with that amount of money with the skyrocketing expenses we are currently faced with? Our society is simply not able to sustain itself.

I believe more in the theory of teaching a man to fish over giving him a fish though, and that is why I may not be able to help every human being I see, but the ones I know I can help, I do.

So in theory, it boils down to the same-same-but-different idea of, if you want to heal the world, start with yourself. If you are centered, balanced (to the best of your abilities) and able to keep your head in present-day timing(because all you have is the here and now) then you are most of the way there.

It is with discipline that you can refocus yourself into the present, ground yourself when overwhelmed, and keep the nagging negative voices in your head at bay. These voices are ego continually trying to disrupt your flow and keep you bound in fear and anxiety instead of in your own inner power to shape your reality.

It’s the same discipline it takes to stop the voices telling you to eat cake when you are on a diet, or the voices that encourage you to gossip about people. We humans have a desire to live wildly and untethered, but without that anchor we aren’t really much good to anyone, never mind ourselves.

If you want to make money and live well, get out of your head and into the game, it’s all in an attitude adjustment, repetition, a little understanding, and basically getting out of your own way. A lot of people aren’t going to understand this, or see this as fluff. Fortunately, I don’t need people to accept these theories for me to practice them well.

The real question is, what do you have to lose by chucking a shitty attitude out of the window? Only good can come from this, and if you don’t believe it now, you will grow to believe it when you wake up living the life you didn’t fathom you could a year ago. Then you will hear the penny drop, and it will all finally make sense.


Genna-Wae Webster is the creative mind behind the clothing brand Wae West. She was named after a character played by Priscilla Presley on Dallas, Genna Wade. She is a free spirit, a lover of furry beings (especially her cats) and believes in existing within the positive realm when it comes to how she lives her day-to-day life. Commercial clothing and costume design have been her passion since her early teens. Unicorns, mermaids, fairies and all things fantastical inspire her. Collecting superhero things, My Little Ponies and shoes get me excited. Getting lost in movies and TV is what she does for escapism from life. Being involved in helping others with guidance wherever she can is also a big part of who she is. She never tires of talking, and fights for the underdog with a strong will, big ideas and bold opinions. Yoga is how she keeps fit, and doing photo shoots for fun is how she grows in confidence by putting herself under the very uncomfortable spotlight. She believes that facing your fears and being authentically You, no matter what people think, is how life should be lived, and living in a state of unconditional happiness is how you maintain a positive mindset.


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