archives, troublemakers

Yes, It’s Okay to Say: Fuck this Shit!

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Fuck it. Just fuck it.

Fuck this shit.

Breathe. Breathe.

“I wasn’t just the madwoman in the attic — I was the attic itself. The past was all over me, all under me, all inside me.” ~ Prozac Nation, Elizabeth Wurtzel

It is okay to lie in bed, bunch the covers up over your head, and make a nest to cry, hide, or sleep. Better to burrow than bury. Then like any animal, come out to stretch and say Hello to the sun. Drink a little water. Eat some food, silly.

“I am infinitely strange to myself.” ~ The French Lieutenant’s Woman, John Fowles

Taking time for yourself is important. Self-care is important. Doing small things for yourself is important.

“To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance.” ~ An Ideal Husband, Oscar Wilde

Take a walk. Make space for yourself. All that Awesome needs room to breathe.

You are not worthless. Your fragmented body, heart, and soul are facets of a crystal that reflect a fucking gorgeous light. Deal with how shiny you are by shining.

“You are part of my existence, part of myself. You have been in every line I have ever read, since I first came here, the rough common boy whose poor heart you wounded even then. You have been in every prospect I have ever seen since — on the river, on the sails of the ships, on the marshes, in the clouds, in the light, in the darkness, in the wind, in the woods, in the sea, in the streets. You have been the embodiment of every graceful fancy that my mind has ever become acquainted with. The stones of which the strongest London buildings are made, are not more real, or more impossible to displace with your hands, than your presence and influence have been to me, there and everywhere, and will be. Estella, to the last hour of my life, you cannot choose but remain part of my character, part of the little good in me, part of the evil.” ~ Great Expectations, Charles Dickens

You are not too much for someone. Your fears and someone’s fears are bumping uglies, and it is time to stop engaging in the fear fuck. Why do you want someone to receive that image — that you are too much?

“Play from your fucking heart!” ~ Bill Hicks

Sensuality and being sensitive are strongly connected; they are whimsical states of being. Every time the heart is touched and every time we touch, we are taking a risk. You can be aware of where you are, and live and love passionately with your heart fully open.

“Enemies are so stimulating!” ~ Katherine Hepburn

No one has the right to treat you like shit. You do not have the right to treat yourself like shit.

“When you are struggling with something, look at all the people around you and realize that every single person you see is struggling with something, and to them, it is just as hard as what you are going through.” ~ Dear John, Nicholas Sparks

Anger is not necessarily negative. It is a cleanser. It shows us where the ouchies are and why we do not need or want something. Let it show you where you hurt and how. Then give it love. If you feel someone has contributed to your anger, sit with it. Do not direct it outward at that person; you are only spreading wildfire. Do not gift or invite hate. That said: Yes, it is okay to voice when something is not okay to you.

“How do people, like, not curse? How is it possible? There are these gaps in speech where you just have to put a ‘fuck’.” ~ A Long Way Down, Nick Hornby

Sometimes we are so busy seeking what we need, when what we need is inches from our eyes. We cannot see it though. Stop. Breathe. When you ask yourself too many questions, when you are outside busting your ass to do what you need to do, you are not available to even listen to yourself.

Surrender. You are not giving up. It is easier to go through something than to try to climb over it.

“Fall seven times, stand up eight.” ~ Japanese Proverb

Why bother? Seriously. If it is not helping you, and the same pattern is only hurting you again and again… it is okay to say No. It is okay to say Goodbye.

“I wanted to say goodbye to someone, and have someone say goodbye to me. The goodbyes we speak and the goodbyes we hear are the goodbyes that tell us we’re still alive.” ~ Wolves of the Call, Stephen King

Stop going the extra mile to receive in return. Let your heart be inspired to give, and if it balks at something, disengage. It does not mean you are not a caring person. It just means you do not take shit; you give a shit because you love.

“Beware; for I am fearless, and therefore powerful.” ~ Frankenstein, Mary Shelley

People are going to be assholes. No matter what perspective you try to think of, no matter how you try to ‘work it out’. People are going to be assholes and will come to their awareness in their own time. That is their responsibility. They are learning something, too. It will hit them later.

“You wanna fly, you got to give up the shit that weighs you down.” ~ Song of Solomon, Toni Morrison

Shit happens. It is shitty. Fuck that shit. Fuck it with a smile and eyes and ears open for your inspiration to move forward.

“If you obey all the rules, you miss all the fun.” ~ Audrey Hepburn

Play. Engage your inner child. Dance in your living room naked. Swing on the swing set at midnight. Pick a flower for yourself. Do something you have not done in forever. Adults need play time, too. Discover the whim in whimsy.

Now smile and say, “Fuck this.”

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Tiffany Chaney is a witchy woman who still swings on the swing set and wishes on stars. She suggests you try it sometime. She paints naked people and people naked, naked trees and trees naked, and non-naked things that are really naked. Her writing has been published in Virginia Quarterly Review’s InstaSeries, Thrush Poetry Journal, and Pedestal Magazine, among others. Her first collection, Between Blue and Grey, won the 2013 Mother Vine Award for Best in Poetry. She has assigned herself the mission of assisting others with self-development, particularly by igniting and inspiring others to reclaim the whimsy and creativity within, to hold ourselves accountable for authoring the narratives of our lives. Now, crank up the volume to the tune playing in your head and dance to a Mad Girl’s Love Song. Make midnight cookies.

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