Reaching for Ridiculous.
“Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius, and it’s better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.” ~ Marilyn Monroe
Writing, or putting ourselves out there in any way at all really, means overcoming varying degrees of fear, depending on personality type, among other factors.
Fear also arises in many of us when embarking on a new venture or making some material change in our lives. Fear of being misunderstood. Fear of inadvertently offending someone. Fear of ridicule. Fear of failure. Fear of… fear.
The reality is that most of these scenarios are not only likely to happen but unavoidable when stepping into the public sphere, or simply by choosing to do something differently in our day-to-day lives. There will be misunderstandings. Someone might very well be offended.
From time to time, we can’t help but feel ridiculous. No matter how carefully we try to sidestep it, everybody makes mistakes or goes through feelings of failure from time to time: these experiences form part of our lessons in Life School.
But it is not those moments of embarrassment or facing difficult criticism, self-directed or not, that shape us as individuals. Rather, it is our reactions in moments of vulnerability that dictate whether we are ultimately traumatized or enriched by such experiences.
It is often far easier to focus on our imperfections than our beauty. So much simpler to admit our madness than our genius. And infinitely safer taking refuge in the familiar over trying something new for fear of appearing ridiculous.
Why is it more automatic to imagine the worst possible result instead of the best possible outcome for ourselves?
In my experience, I believe it is about preparing myself for failure just in case things don’t work out. Taking precautions to minimize the potential of any pain. And the truth is, that approach has never particularly worked out well in my case.
If anything, preparing for the worst typically makes me forget the part about expecting the best. And then sadly, the idea of making a poor choice or tripping up along the way becomes enormously prohibitive in my mind.
Lately I’m thinking a lot about moments in my life where I’ve allowed fear to dictate a decision. It seems that whenever I choose not to rock the boat, it is at the expense of my dreams. The trade-off is never worth it.
Going forward with a little more self-awareness, a dash of determination and a whole lot of courage, perhaps it will be easier to listen to what my gut is telling me is the right thing to do instead of letting fear run the show.
Regrets do not manifest through the act of trying and failing. Regrets appear when we decide not to follow our instinctive desire to do that which speaks to the heart.
So it’s time to allow that inner renegade risk taker out to play.
Step into the light, says Marianne. Be absolutely ridiculous, says Marilyn. When faced with the possibility of failure, let’s collectively say So Fucking What? and keep on going.
Courage, my loves. Embrace your dreams. Be willing to make mistakes. Reach for the ridiculous.
Most of all, enjoy the journey — wherever it leads you.
*****
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