The Battle Within.
By Stefanie Magallanes
Work with me,
not against me.
We’re on the same team.
Why those words?
You know where to poke,
how to get under my skin,
yet still you ignore me…
You win.
Words fall short
and can often persuade
who will be first
to drop this charade.
We both know it.
We both know the truth.
Immaturity was for our youth.
Not forsaking the child within,
from that we create,
and are free from sin.
It’s the innocence
of what held my attention that day.
It’s the light that I saw
when we locked eyes.
There was so much potential to uncover.
Through you it was me
that I began to discover.
So how can I fault you so easily?
How can I repeat
strong words to defeat,
when all I want
is the best for you.
Yet there is power in knowing
how to take that away too.
I will practice
not to feed that need.
To control what is
and let it just be.
When fear creeps in
and I’m clawing within,
needing a taste
to remind of your disgrace,
I will take a step back.
Retracting my shield
if you do the same.
I want to feel safe and open with you.
I want you to be part of my team too.
A foundation that’s secure.
Open. True.
A sort of nirvana,
as honest as virtue.
Responsibility to hear and to accept
that sometimes we may not
want to face the each other’s upsets
No longer feeding the games
that get us nowhere.
Don’t confuse my intentions.
I don’t want to be a wife.
I want someone to count on.
I don’t want a title.
I want adventure and discovery.
Not something to keep me idle.
I want to nurture my heart
and connect with my soul.
To be good to yourself first.
Do the work it takes.
We hurt the ones we love most of all,
it’s a chance to rewrite,
if you answer the call.
I’m starting to see
this battle is with myself,
not just with
you
and
me.
*****
Stefanie Magallanes discovers herself and truth from one experience to the next. Never one to walk hand in hand with patience, she lives and grows through the impulsiveness of her passion for the details. Intrapersonal communication has held an accountability within her for the thoughts she thinks, what lioness within her she so chooses to feed, and the fluttering of feathers when she carries herself away to solitude to truly grasp what can be gained from experience and that which can be left behind. Unleashing an inner warrior, she finds her footing through her travels, acknowledging when scared that it is a flashing light, to go through it, reading, writing and most of all through listening intuitively while in conversation with others. The art of having grace through each shift she encounters comes from a learned dance with gratitude. Grateful to have experienced what magic can come from grieving through loss, crying out of joy, laughing with love, and breaking open something inside that leaves a lasting radiance of knowledge once it passes. Awareness has become her source for inspiration and her motivation is wound with a never ending curiosity to follow the path of synchronicity. If her adult self could relive a moment in childhood, she would undeniably give someone else the chance to finally play Ariel when out for a swim.