How To Stop Perpetuating The Cycle Of Fear.
{Photo via Pinterest}
I’m here to tell you that it is okay. You don’t need to worry, be sorry, or expect unrealistic things of yourself.
I want to let you know that none of us are prepared for life. We’re born naked and helpless, victims of circumstance, and unable to choose when, where or how we come into, and learn about, this world.
As newborn babies, we are unable to feed ourselves, walk, or communicate. Our physical and mental fates are in the hands of individuals desperately trying to survive themselves. Life is a test from the minute we struggle for those first breaths.
We literally have to learn to move, to look, to grab, chew, walk, run, speak, and understand in a world that seems to contradict our natural urges.
We learn to discover and are amazed at the wonder of everything, and then we are told, “Don’t touch that, put it down, that’s not for you, and stay away from that.”
We learn the fascinating sounds of speech we can form with our mouths, and then we’re told, “Be quiet, lower your voice, say Hello, say Goodbye,” or asked, “Who taught you that word?”
We learn the freedom of running, spinning, rolling and climbing, and then we’re told, “Sit still, get down from there and behave, stop fidgeting,” and asked why we can’t just stop for a moment.
All this happens before we venture into the worlds of friendship, school, expectations and rules; before we start to truly tackle the challenges that come our way emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually. Before we are even fully aware and begin to fully know and understand what is expected of us.
These are just the first warning shots — the first bullets that whiz past our bodies, lightly grazing our skin — as we slowly start to comprehend the enormousness of living.
Then we grow, and without warning we’re marched out and lined up in front of the firing squads of parental expectation, adolescents, bullying, testing, puberty, rules, norms, values, fitting in, jobs, relationships, broken hearts and disappointment.
Our bodies, minds and souls are blindfolded and bound as we struggle to take in, deal with, and understand who we are, where we are, what our purpose is, and how we get to where we feel we need to be.
We are forced to do all of this while being deafened by the gunfire of life, unable to discern from which direction the bullets are suddenly flying at us from, and why people are even shooting at us in the first place.
We’re learning, discovering, wondering, and enjoying our introduction into life when suddenly we are hit and punctured full of holes by the bullets of emotion, responsibility, hang-ups, and things embedded into our subconscious without our knowledge.
The bullets pierce us so deeply that they break the bones of our self-worth, shred the skin of our confidence, and rupture the heart of our self-belief, as we desperately struggle to dodge and shield ourselves.
We become scared to cry, as our tears may be seen as weakness. We try not to show pain, as we fear that we’ll be looked down upon and stared at with disdain.
Instead, we hide it all — the tears, the fear, the uncertainty. We try to pretend that the bullets don’t bother us and that the pain is not real, while hoping that someone will stop whoever is firing at us.
But I’m here to tell you that it’s okay.
We are all dodging bullets in a fight to escape the barrage of gunfire, trying desperately to survive the firing squad, and become the person we want to be. None of us were born bulletproof, we’re all full of holes, lined up along the wall next to one another and bombarded with shots.
But we can stop it; we can all walk away.
All we have to do is stop trying so hard to dodge the bullets and instead, accept the fear, doubt and pain being fired toward us. If we do this, we can then look closely at the firing squads and get a good look at their faces.
Only then will we see ourselves amongst them, not just in our own firing squad but also in the firing squads of all the people either side of us — a gun in our hand, our finger pulling the trigger.
We perpetuate this cycle by picking up a gun loaded with negative energy and then joining the ranks of those firing indiscriminately at others, whom are just simply trying to enjoy the wonder of life.
None of us are born bulletproof and none of us have to be, as long as we all simply stop firing and put down our guns.
*****
Emanuel Adelekun is a writer and a filmmaker, as well as a hip-hop-culture-loving warrior-b-boy. Always honest, he talks too much, always has an opinion, and tends to push people, but that’s okay with him because he has accepted that he’s a wild, fiery spirit who believes in true self-expression. He follows the path of always striving to develop, improve and better understand the frequency on which his soul vibes, making this his way of life. In the end, he believes in keeping it simple: stay open, live to explore, experience, and enjoy the moment. Cherish your mistakes, always be a student, don’t take shit from anyone, and treat others how you would like them to treat you. Through his words, Emanuel hopes to make connections with other similar souls, and maybe open people to something more inside themselves. You could contact Emanuel via his website, Instagram or Facebook.
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