Now They’re Eternalized: The Ways Grief Transports You. {poetry}
Grief. It can take you to faraway places.
Like when you think you’re sitting at home, on the carpet, cross-legged
Eyes closed, and suddenly,
You’re gone.
Transported completely, as if on a wisp of air
To that place, that person, that scent, that familiar sound of their face or curvature of their jaw
Your house is warm and it’s winter, but you can feel the wind on your cheek, smelling like autumn and crisp like the evening you met them
Their voice
Or laugh, reverberates through your living room, and suddenly it’s only their eyes you can see, twinkling, huge, glimmering, laughing with you
Laughing in spite of you, in spite of the pain they have caused you by leaving and suddenly you know it’s okay.
They’re busy exploring the fifth dimension and skating along the lines of the Milky Way, riding Orion’s waves like halfpipes, and somehow you’re gliding along with them
Connected on a string,
You always did follow them on all their crazy escapes
No matter how dark and frightening the night felt before they arrived
How dangerous their plans seemed, and how scared you would have been if they had not been there, skating beside you,
And you forgave all their mishaps, even when you were flooded with the strongest anger you’ve ever felt but then you saw their eyes
Laughing with you, full of mischief and childish innocence
And even now, you’ll forgive them anything, even after they’ve chosen to leave
Because this world became too much, too immensely dark for them to handle
The momentum of all the times they’ve been let down, lunged them into despair
And they were not from here, in the first place
Just a visitor, a temporary change-maker, a way-shower, burning bright and quickly leaving a path of fires as they sped on through life unapologetically and wild
And now they’re eternalized in the cosmic playground, forever a rebellious punk kid taking on the world with a smile, and a joke
Maybe it’s the countless times you sat, unravelling the layers of each other’s heart in the presence of each other, and somehow the threads got tied together
Or the letters you wrote connected into one, long chain
Or all the roads they crossed to meet you lined up into one
But you’re tied together now,
And though it’s dark and lit only by candles in your room, you see a bright flash of light
One of the ways they make themselves known to you now.
Like when you feel a rush of emotions that are not yours flood your body, a remembrance of what they had felt on this plane, at some point
Or see their face flash, almost imperceptibly but undeniably, in the face of a lover
Or know they are sitting in the passenger’s seat, as you drive and sing their songs
These are the ways they visit you now.
So fare thee well, sweet friend
Until the next one
I’ll be here, floating through the dimensions
Transported far away
While sitting, cross-legged, on the carpet, in the middle of a cold winter.
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Lauren Jade is a Love Coach for modern beings seeking more mystical lives. She is a true believer that freedom can be found deeply within the modern working world, and she wants to bring sacred partnership back to modern life. In her healing and writing, Lauren engages with archetypes of the wild woman, the witch and the queen, to evoke deep resonance of freedom, passion, sovereignty, elegance and creativity within the psyche. She lives by the ocean in Connecticut where she writes, heals and mentors via her online coaching company and community, The Jade Sanctuary.
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