Your Voice Is More Golden Than Silence. {poetry}
I was never really an expressive person. I would make myself small and keep my thoughts to myself because it was the most comfortable option.
I never doubted the importance of standing up for yourself or others. I greatly admired those who would do that, but when it came to my own freedom of speech, I would hide behind the excuse that I was more of a listener than a speaker.
In recent years, I’ve decided to change that. I’ve been making more of an effort to reconnect with my emotions and teach myself to express them. At first, this was through journal entries and poems that I kept completely private. The more I did this, the easier it became. I began to explore who I was and what I wanted in life.
Honestly, I still haven’t figured that out entirely, but I understand myself better and have more of a sense of direction. After some time, I started to share my writing with close friends and then share some of them on social media. By using my voice, connections with those around me have grown deeper and stronger.
Learning how to express myself has not been an easy or quick process, but I’m glad that I gathered the courage to start it.
I wrote this poem to inspire myself and others to keep practicing their expression. Everyone has their own reasons for not being able to or not wanting to express themselves. Each of those reasons are valid and can make self-expression much harder than it seems. I know this, but I still urge you to try. It doesn’t matter how long this may take you or how small your steps are.
You just have to start somewhere, even if it’s with yourself. Breaking through your silence and making use of your voice really does make a difference, to you and those around you. Your voice is more golden than silence could ever be.
***
I am the voice you deem unfit to sing
Whose groans you restrain and squeals you suppress
I am what you have fabled as talentless
After pruning my buds
In the name of fears you fear to name
Swallowed and neglected
I watch as others conquer verbal feats
My brothers and sisters have been wielded as weapons
Marveled for their omnipotent nature piercing each other
Praised for their inspiration
Appreciated for their compassion
Feared for their wild lashings
And mourned for their sorrowful farewells
I, like my brothers and sisters,
Possess the raw power you yearn for
Yet resist to taste
I am your voice but I hear you
With quick shallow breaths
And an internal whimper
Like a trembling child
Afraid of their slumbering strength
Let me assure you
I am yours
I have matured through your silence
I will be honed through your sore throat
I exist only to serve
Carrying you exactly as you are
More than a weapon
I am a shield and home
Reverberating through you as distinguished as your heartbeat
Exceeding the devotion of a stead
I rest between your hands and eyes
Poised to express your visions and actions
Faithfully awaiting your permission.
***
Avanya Manickum is a South African wanderer who will never give up her free spirit. She is determined to live her life in a way that brings her joy and freedom, no matter how unconventional that may seem. She loves being outdoors, spending time with loved ones, reading, writing and puzzles. Avanya has published poems in The Urban Howl, an online magazine, and articles on Her View From Home and The South African. You can find more of her writing on Instagram.