poetry

Manual Instructions For Opening My Heart. {poetry}

{Photo via Tumblr}

{Photo via Tumblr}

Let me bring you tea

Bring you tears.

Let me rub your feet

Make your eyes roll back in your head.

Let me hear you speak of god

Tapping to enter the psychedelic cathedral.

That’ll get my blood moving, opening the first valve.

Let me have my mood splayed on my stomach,

futzing on Facebook.

Climb on

Press your belly to my back

Ignore my elbow dig your rib

If I sigh, dare to mock

If I shrug, grab my skin with your teeth

Bite the muscle between my neck and my shoulder

kinda hard. That should open the second valve.

I’ll buck for sure, but clamp on like a pup to a towel

And growl…

till I laugh

which I will

‘cuz I’m easy.

The third valve is tricky

It’s trusting the fall

with no will to die

the death of merging.

Don’t be the knight or the damsel

The One or the Other

Mind or body

Always or never

Inside or outside

Meet in the middle means

No selfless compromises

No bearing crosses or bringing rings

No leaving scars.

At the same time, open wild

No holds barred.

What makes that fourth valve stick?

Nice normal pleasant safe

Thank you, no.

Dream of cozy evenings at home alone

Sharing a bottle of red

Charmed by shadows on a flat screen

Sorry, Cupid, no.

Strip me raw

Lift chin with first finger

Make me find my eye in yours

Hold its gaze

Unremitting,

Until I…

Stop blinking

Stop cringing

Stop doubting

Stop trying

Stop fixing

Stop flogging

Stop apologizing

Stop deferring

Stop catering

Stop pleasing

Stop smiling

Stop settling

Stop stopping!

Bind me, bless me, embolden me

But do not give me back my eye until

I blood-swear

I love myself completely.

Then drop your guards

And beg that I demand

the same of you.

Crash the terror wall

Shredding knees on ego shards

Scratch scream grieve burn

Race over hot playa sands

And when a phat moon rises fresh and ripe,

Start twirling, tossing up lust sparks

Breaching

Back diving through the flaming portal

Reaching

To squeeze the lime.

That outta turn the fourth valve.

I want to give it up

You want to take it;

You take

I give.

To ride the whirling red river

through the labyrinth,

you gotta get on top, girl!

If they ask, who’s in charge?

Go ahead, tell ’em…

You are.

*****

AmberLuckycosmosAmber Luckycosmos is an eco-philosopher and amazon outlander flourishing and fighting for compassion and justice, out beyond nice and normal, in the fields where love and power meet. Her day job as a community college instructor finds her striving to corrupt the youth. At dusk she rides for the changing blues and the rising moon.

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