My knowledge, insights, and skills didn’t rain from glitter-filled clouds from the night skies while angels sang me to sleep. Painful experiences shaped me.
I desired ultimate care and unconditional love, something I hadn’t received as a child. So what I did was basically walking around, looking for a parent.
You can’t even fathom just how many people need to know about your story. Who can intimately relate to what you describe. And who are yearning to connect with others who 'get them'.
It can actually feel like ecstasy if one drops their prejudices and embraces their feelings with curiosity and compassion. I started playing with it and getting truly ecstatic, and if it doesn't feel great, I am now able to still be with it, and feel it. My ego is going mad, but this terror ...
All I feel is love and gratitude, if I put my ego aside, that occasionally wants to complain and rather point out all the things that sucked -- which is okay and normal too, just don’t let it run the show. Don’t be afraid of doing epic shit. Don’t be afraid of looking silly.
You are always ready to strike back, to chop off the enemy’s head. For being told what to do. For being asked a favor even. Everything that smells the slightest bit like expectation or demand gets you mad. Of course you’ll do it — but with an inner No of deep abandon and ...
To disobey means to always question the status quo, to sense opportunities for improvement, for the expression and manifestation of spirit, without forcing it to happen in a certain way, but with helping to birth it into reality the way it wants to be born. That’s the most difficult and most ...
Often there is a breakdown before a breakthrough. Like the little seed that doesn't know that it's going to be a mighty tree with its branches kissing the sky, you don't know what life has in stock for you in the future.
Even now, when I’m broke, stuck, depressed, I still manage to hold my head up high, thoroughly maintaining my hard-earned level of resistance. This dark pervert part in me has the lead, still. It is crazy, mad, irresponsible, but so fucking strong and powerful; it’s holding the reins of my life ...